Stillness

There comes a time, normally following a number of weeks of high intensity, when my mind shutters out the chaff of the daily doings and my body seeks the equilibrium that was disturbed by the events requiring so much of my limited reserves. One of two things occur at this point; either I get horribly sick or I begin another repetitious cycle of insomnia. It is strange that my body craves rest yet is unable to allow my mind the ability to drift and not spin. I watch these familiar events almost as a casual observer, albeit a sleepy, unfocused, and dare I say, grumpy one. Although the insomnia normally takes a few weeks, maybe few months to resolve, I prefer it over illness. During the early hours of the morning I sit and knit, maybe catch up on a book or two, nonplussed at rereading a single paragraph several times over or repeatedly ripping back a few rows. There might only be a few short hours of sleep in the end, but those hours unwinding the coils of wakefulness are quiet and contemplative and productive in manner that belies my normal nature. This is the way in which my mind learns again to achieve stillness once more.

This is a long, self-involved way of saying that a decision has been made, I am recovering from and preparing for the ensuing madness, and this blog will be back online quite soon…

after I get some good sleep.

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2 thoughts on “Stillness

  1. Wow… sounds like you are in such a similar situation! I hope your situation goes well and looking forward to hearing about it. It’s always so nice to know other people are experiencing similar things. Makes one feel a wee bit less crazy. 😉

    I edited the pattern entry to show my yardage: 3 skeins of Malabrigo Worsted, which are 216 yards apiece.
    xo!

  2. You write beautifully about this. Sending good thoughts, I hope that everything goes well. And I admire your ability to get up and do something when sleepless (thankfully not often) – for some reason that never occurs to me while I’m rolling around, looking at the clock every once in awhile & getting more & more frustrated!

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